For the Love of Zombies: Guest post by S.G. Browne

Paranormal Wastelands is proud to present - a guest post from the most famous author of Breathers - Mr. S.G. Browne!!

So, put up your bloody axes, drop those chains for just a bit, and come find out why he's just falling to pieces over zombies......... BOO!

I've always been a zombie fan, ever since I saw Romero's original Night of the Living Dead on Creature Features back when I was in sixth grade I’ve been enamored with them. They became my favorite monster. I even used to dream about them chasing me through the streets. Or surrounding my house. Or doing my taxes. And I’ll admit that I enjoy the fast moving zombies as well as the shuffling ones. I’m not a purist. They're both terrifying in their own way.

As for the other classic monsters, they don’t quite hold the same appeal for me as zombies.



Werewolves? They’re like the jocks of the monster world. Full of testosterone, pumped up on steroids, sprouting hair and fangs, howling at the moon, and always trying to be the center of attention. I just can’t take them seriously. Plus no one ever worries about a werewolf apocalypse. I mean, come on…that would be ridiculous.



Vampires? They’re the frat boys of monsters. All pretty and full of themselves and constantly trying to get you into bed. Every move they make, all the posturing they do, is just a smoke screen to lure you in so that they can feed on you. Drink your blood.



They're insincere. Hiding their true motives. Scam artists.



Zombies, on the other hand, don't try to impress you with their good looks or their charms or their ability to burst out of their Lacoste polo shirt every four weeks. They don't pretend to be something they're not. They wear their decomposing hearts on their sleeves and aren't ashamed to say, “I'm a zombie and I want to eat your brains.”

Zombies have an unpretentious veracity. I admire that in a monster. Plus, they're tragically comical, shuffling along, losing their hair and teeth and nails and the occasional appendage. Add the fact that they used to be us, that we could all become them one day, and it creates a sense of empathy that, ultimately, was the reason I wrote Breathers in the first place.

-S.G. Browne

http://www.undeadanonymous.com/



And because S.G. is just sooooooo super awesome he brought a little gift...
a Tick-or-Treat if you will!

One lucky winner will win a personalized signed copy of his fantastic book...

This contest is open to residents in the US & Canada. You must also be a follower so if your not already join us! I promise we don't bite....wellllll most of the time *winks*

Just fill out the Rafflecopter form below and please PLEASE don't forget to leave your mailing address, along with who you would like the book signed to!!

Bite ya next time....

Make sure if you are in the Seattle area ~ October 21st -23rd ~ to stop by ZomBcon. S.G. Browne will be there DYING to meet you and your BRAINZ!

Breathers: A Zombie's Lament

Title: Breathers: A Zombie's Lament
Author: S.G. Browne
Published: 2009
Synopsis from Goodreads:


For fans of Max Brooks’s The Zombie Survival Guide and zombie aficionados everywhere, a hilarious debut novel about life (and love) after death.

Meet Andy Warner, a recently deceased everyman and newly minted zombie. Resented by his parents, abandoned by his friends, and reviled by a society that no longer considers him human, Andy is having a bit of trouble adjusting to his new existence. But all that changes when he goes to an Undead Anonymous meeting and finds kindred souls in Rita, an impossibly sexy recent suicide with a taste for the formaldehyde in cosmetic products, and Jerry, a twenty-one-year-old car-crash victim with an exposed brain and a penchant for Renaissance pornography. When the group meets a rogue zombie who teaches them the joys of human flesh, things start to get messy, and Andy embarks on a journey of self-discovery that will take him from his casket to the SPCA to a media-driven class-action lawsuit on behalf of the rights of zombies everywhere.

Darkly funny, surprisingly touching, and gory enough to satisfy even the most discerning reader, Breathers is a romantic zombie comedy (rom-zom-com, for short) that will leave you laughing, squirming, and clamoring for more.



What happens when you die? Well, I assume that you see a light and go one way or the other. Right? The world goes black and you sleep forever? You get buried? Maybe burned? People mourn for you?

Well, what happens if you are placed in your lovely casket with a fabulous satin bedding and all of the sudden you wake up?

Well, in my opinion... there are tons of screams, some might pass out, and you're sitting there wondering why on earth you are in your Sunday Best.

This is what Breathers is about. The Zombie world that has been kept hidden from us for forever and a day. OH! Hidden you ask? Yes in deedy!! You see... Zombies don't have ANY civil rights and are just the chewed up gum on the bottom of the fat cat's shoe of society.

In this book, ANDY is reanimated after a car wreck. He loses his wife and because zombies aren't allowed to see their kids he also loses his daughter to his wife's brother's family. Andy goes to live with his parents. His Dad's not too cool... well, not cool at ALL to have Andy living there stinking up the house with his zombie funk and his Mom is trying to act like nothing is different but she won't touch him at all.

Well, how does a newly born zombie deal with all the new horrors of society. I mean: he can't drive, he can't get a job, he has to drink shampoo with flamowdohyde (oh hells! I don't know how to spell that hahas!) in it just to stay fresh, and if you're poor Andy -- well, you've kinda been smushed, have a limp, and your vocal cords aren't working right. Well, what do you do? Why, you go to a zombie support group that meets twice a week!! That's what you do!!

LOLZ! This book is great!! It's like Shaun of the Dead meets Beetlejuice meets One Flew over the CooCoo's Nest (the movie... never read the book, so I'm guessing they are similar lolz). I laughed, I gasped, I awed (that's right people! Check out the cover!! There is some zombie swoon in it!! I've never read zombie swoon before but it was most excellent), and the ending will leave you wanting more. Actually the ending reminded me of the ending with Jon Connor in Terminator 3. You know the one. Not the new one with the breathy husky voicey Batman in it. No! The one with the younger kid. Yeah, read this book and let me know if you thought that too.

I totally recommend this book to any zombie lover. It doesn't reflect zombies as the big baddies that are just wanting to tear into human flesh. It also shows the softer more cuddlier side of a zombie. OK OK... It does start out with Andy's parents stuffed in his freezer... but I swear... these zombies are cuddlier hahahs!!

Awesome read!

Wanna join the Zompacolypse hop? Want all the Wastelanders to trick or treat at your blog this Halloween? Then why don't you join the most awesome party around?! Details are Here but beware of the zombies!! Remember.... we warned ya -- muhahahahas!